Notes from the Week: By Oliver

Monday

Finn had a good time with her aunts trying to figure out her Halloween costume with her Mom and Aunts, even though they were acting very childish. Kamille had dinner with her mom and sister and it was fun because she hadn’t been wioth them in a while. Rowan over the weekend felt sad, and he didn’t know why so he layed on his kitchen counter, spreading many germs to his table, and started to Cry. He realized that he was crying because he was turning thirteen the next day and he felt like he was losing his childhood. So he got off the counter and played with his Playmobiles and listened to the Beatles. Two things which represented his childhood.

I then complained about how fast everyone was talking and how slow I was writing their thoughts.

Chase said he had a good time Bowling with Rowan and Patrick, and it was good to bond with them.

Eric said “I heard you guys played some weird game that I’d never heard of” I said “Bowling?” and then the class spent around twenty minutes laughing, while discussing how Eric must not do what Bowling is.

Patrick said that over the weekend he saw Chase and Rowan while bowling, Luke and Rio at Hockey, and Reed, Rider and Finn at Agway. We all laughed. Now what could they be doing at Agway? Picking up the latest 12 inch zipper pair of Carhartt Overalls? Someone asked Eric if he had bought any Carhartts at Agway lately. Eric replied with “Oh, I only go to Agway when I’m feeling especially rich. Usually I buy my clothing by the pound.” After another long period of time laughing at how Eric buys his clothes by the pound, Calder said that Tal said that if we didn’t win the Wiffleball game against the board, that we would all be flogged. I added in that we would be castrated.

Simon was at a coming of age thing that he goes to every week. They talked about their favorite childhood games, and for the rest of the time they played house. Event though he didn’t really play it a lot when he was younger, it was still good to play it. Someone asked if this was a step up from the Sex Ed class Anna had attended last year, it was. Anna said she was in Maine with her Grandmamma, and usually her Grandmamma was taking care of her but this time she wanted to take care of her. She felt like it was a sign of growing up. Rider had a man night with his sister’s boyfriend, Ned. And it was good to do that with him. When asked what a man night was, Rider replied that it involved going to PizzaPut (where all the men hang out) eating Steak, and watching the Matrix.

Kamille had dinner with her mom and sister and it was fun because she hadn’t been with them in a while.

I looked to my left, and Tsering was drawing a second Fantasy Football Logo, on the top it said Kardashian’s Cannibal Crew, with a lady standing with a piece of freshly chopped human meat from Greg’s Meat Market. She had to redo it because, in the last one she had spelled cannibal wrong.

Anneke went to see her grandmother with her cousins, and one was a 3rd grader. The 3rd grader wanted to explore her grandmas large house. Anneke went along even though she had explored it many times in the past. Going through secret passages. She thought that at her Grandmas she would just be alone or with Abi. The little cousins were excited by little things. Anneke wishes she could do that but she thinks she can’t because she knows too much, that it makes things not exciting. Like when her cousins were getting excited because they found a little door, and they didn’t know where it went. Anneke wasn’t excited because she knew it lead to just a garage. Rose read a poem

A Ritual To Read to Each Other

If you don't know the kind of person I am

and I don't know the kind of person you are

a pattern that others made may prevail in the world

and following the wrong god home we may miss our star.

For there is many a small betrayal in the mind,

a shrug that lets the fragile sequence break

sending with shouts the horrible errors of childhood

storming out to play through the broken dyke.

And as elephants parade holding each elephant's tail,

but if one wanders the circus won't find the park,

I call it cruel and maybe the root of all cruelty

to know what occurs but not recognize the fact.

And so I appeal to a voice, to something shadowy,

a remote important region in all who talk:

though we could fool each other, we should consider--

lest the parade of our mutual life get lost in the dark.

For it is important that awake people be awake,

or a breaking line may discourage them back to sleep;

the signals we give--yes or no, or maybe--

should be clear: the darkness around us is deep.

William Stafford

Later For All-Tal at the end of the day we talked about Cleanup problems, compost, and whether to combine Science jobs with regular jobs.

Tuesday

We had a guest Mickel Zuidhoek from Australia, but he was also a supporter of the Dutch National Team (for soccer). He is a carpenter who lives in Manchester VT who is interested in starting a high school. We introduced ourselves. And passed out our notebooks. Morgan said last night She’d had finished her homework, her dad was home and her mom was at some meeting, and he asked her to play Russian Bang—fun to do that with him, for like three hours.

Rider said that last year Tal talked about Emerson’s Circles or Rings, and how we are always expanding, and he felt like he hasn’t been expanding lately. We then had a long talk, and it ended with a synthesis of; Rider wants to be connected to Chase and back and forth. They had a connection and Rider abused it. Calder can’t connect to Chase and Rowan has a connection with Chase, but is jealous of Rider and Chase’s sometimes. Rider is trying to figure out how to use his power and keep being a good person.

Rowan in the middle of the night Friday at Sebastian’s Birthday Party, while Alec and Sebastian and I were inside watching “Austin Powers,” Sully and Rowan were outside in the snow on the trampoline, talking about how Sully felt like he was growing up too fast. They were talking about real things and this was the first time Rowan had done that. He liked it. Simon was looking at his Math Eval over the weekend and at first getting mad for the little flaws. But then he saw how far he has come from last year, and he didn’t concentrate on the flaws. Finn said playing soccer with her Brother in the rain was fun, because neither of them were getting competitive. Eliot and Turner were watching videos from long times ago, like graduation, and it was good too. Anneke, said after Claire left, her sister and her got in a fight over music. Her sister started swearing and she felt bad, because she felt like her little sister was growing up too fast, and she was supposed to be showing her the way and she felt like she wasn’t.

Claire was visiting her stepbrother in Washington, and her stepbrother introduced her as her little sister, and that felt good, and after reading the Lit she was thinking about her Grandpa, and then she wrote him a note.

Claire read a poem.

Eating Poetry

Mark Strand

I

Eating Poetry

Ink runs from the corners of my mouth.

There is no happiness like mine.

I have been eating poetry.

The librarian does not believe what she sees.

Her eyes are sad

and she walks with her hands in her dress.

The poems are gone.

The light is dim.

The dogs are on the basement stairs and coming up.

Their eyeballs roll,

their blond legs burn like brush.

The poor librarian begins to stamp her feet and weep.

She does not understand.

When I get on my knees and lick her hand,

she screams.

I am a new man,

I snarl at her and bark,

I romp with joy in the bookish dark.

Wednesday

Evan had fun drawing Evil corn with Claire during science, a very educational act.

Jesse and Claire made a Birthday cake for their mom, and then they messed it up and Jesse was freaking out, but her mom told her to stop worrying, that she only cared about them being together, and Jesse thought that was nice.

Rider was thinking about the way people dress, and how on Tuesday I was wearing sweatpants and a Howard Dean shirt, and he thought it was a lot more real than my skinny jeans. I cringed at the thought.

Rose after the wiffleball game was talking to Cindy and Michael Seligman. They said we’ve come a long way from our competitive nature at the beginning. Then Micheal said he loved us, and Cindy said that Rose went too easy on us.

Last night, Patrick wrote a Character Sketch on Yared and he noticed how all the little things are meaningful. There was then a rant about Character Sketches by Tal. Claire had done her Homework, and was watching the intellectual, riveting show of “Gossip Girl,” and a chat bubble from me popped up and it was good to talk to me.

Eric said, he noticed how Finn loved everyone’s little quirks, because she noticed how he was talking to himself, and she laughed happily. Jesse read a poem by ex-nbs’er Eliza Carver

The Waking

When we come to it there will be no surrendered flags.

There will be no monument of divinity, or mountain of truth,

Here, the stair spirals up against our weary feet,

Against our stubborn quarries, and our indefinite words.

Here, coiled up tight, we wait for something to clasp your hand.

Here, where we stand before our silent words,

There will be no heroes to pick you up, or set you down.

Here, where something turns or wavers before our tired feet.

Our eyes travel before us, seeking for fertile lands.

Where imminent delight will fill out footsteps

And here, at the same time

Something inside us is overflowing with joy,

Upon waking one morning we will out stretch our arms.

To draw down a curtain of understanding,

Of realization, just one day out of many days.

Again and again, we find nothing but our hearts,

Set as empty shells thrown over the stair.

When we find ourselves again,

Upon infertile and deserted lands,

We will be nothing but reflections in our eyes.

But in our hearts, that is where we will come to it.

When our paths have been washed away,

When the land has been flooded and scraped clean.

We will take to the light, past our doubts and indecisions.

We will live, in circles upon circles,

Out of shells filled with forgotten triumphs, and scars.

Nothing will be left but the foundation of a heart.

-Eliza Carver NBS 08

Thursday

Calder said that Tal said that Today study was important to do well because he was at the Doctor.

Evan said Dalia came over and they played and it was fun.

Kylie told of how her dad was getting really into her Halloween costume, as was she and it was good to do that with him.

Simon, on the bus first started talking about Justin Beiber, and whether or not he had been castrated, but the conversation turned into what it was like being in 9th grade.

Rose said that she was with Jared looking at the fantasy football logos, and he was really impressed of Annekes Teddy Bear drawing, and he was asking Rose if he would be as good of an artist as Anneke is. She said that she thought Anneke was good at art, because she was having fun with it. Eric added in that when he saw Anneke’s art, he was amazed, BUT unlike Jared, he was not wondering if he would be able to draw like that.

Sarah said yesterday Yared gave her a hug for the first time, and it was the only good thing that had happened all week.

Rider noticed that Claire wrote I love Tate on a graphing calculator, and he thought it was cool out of all the things she could’ve written.

Yared yelled, “GODAMMIT Tate! You’re taking all the girls!" Reed read a poem by EE Cummings

I carry your heart with me(i carry it in

my heart)i am never without it(anywhere

i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done

by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want

no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)

and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows

higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

Friday-Halloween

We had costumes galore. Ranging from Co-op shoppers to Michael Jackson to Harold and Maude to a Clown to Winston from 1984. Tal talked about how he liked Bob Dylan costumes, and Literary themed costumes.

Miles mentioned how the night before he was at Evan’s playing video games and it was good to be with him.

Morgan was saying that after soccer at the field house, Kylie was getting anxious about finding a wig for Halloween, and her dad drove them all around Burlington looking for one while they listened to Reggae, and played a game involving heated seats.

Tal made me stand up and model my costume, a co-op shopper. Complete with a booty-infront, gardening shoes, and a bra.

Simon had fun with Eliot at clay.

We talked about how dumb Zombies were, and all they do is run around and slap people.

Tate/Dogbert. He was working on costume with his brother, Owen, good to do that with him.

We then demonstrated miming. Tal decided that Calder, Tsering, and I are the worst mimers alive.

Tsering/Big fat tomato talked about how she hung out with Hattie, for the first time in a week, and they gossiped about the Bridge School gossip.

Calder/Sherlock Holmes told of being with Henry, his brother, after school, and it was good to be with him, because he hadn’t seen him for 3 weeks, he was happy.

Simon read a poem

The charge of the light brigade

Half a league half a league,

Half a league onward,

All in the valley of Death

Rode the six hundred:

'Forward, the Light Brigade!

Charge for the guns' he said:

Into the valley of Death

Rode the six hundred.

'Forward, the Light Brigade!'

Was there a man dismay'd ?

Not tho' the soldier knew

Some one had blunder'd:

Theirs not to make reply,

Theirs not to reason why,

Theirs but to do & die,

Into the valley of Death

Rode the six hundred.

Cannon to right of them,

Cannon to left of them,

Cannon in front of them

Volley'd & thunder'd;

Storm'd at with shot and shell,

Boldly they rode and well,

Into the jaws of Death,

Into the mouth of Hell

Rode the six hundred.

Flash'd all their sabres bare,

Flash'd as they turn'd in air

Sabring the gunners there,

Charging an army while

All the world wonder'd:

Plunged in the battery-smoke

Right thro' the line they broke;

Cossack & Russian

Reel'd from the sabre-stroke,

Shatter'd & sunder'd.

Then they rode back, but not

Not the six hundred.

Cannon to right of them,

Cannon to left of them,

Cannon behind them

Volley'd and thunder'd;

Storm'd at with shot and shell,

While horse & hero fell,

They that had fought so well

Came thro' the jaws of Death,

Back from the mouth of Hell,

All that was left of them,

Left of six hundred.

When can their glory fade?

O the wild charge they made!

All the world wonder'd.

Honour the charge they made!

Honour the Light Brigade,

Noble six hundred!

-Alfred, Lord Tennyson

"I love a place and things that live there"

Notes: Recorded By Claire

We began the morning with meeting. Tsering had a great time in Burlington on Saturday with Eliot, Morgan and Kamille. Tal went on a rant about how he thought that it was stupid that everyone was shopping on Saturday instead of being outside in the beautiful weather. After Tal had stopped making fun of everyone, she went on. She said that while she was picking up her brother from the Teen Center, she saw a meaningful quote on the refrigerator, “Your life is not about finding yourself, it’s about creating yourself.” Tal pretended to ignore that meaningful fact and went on to laugh about the goblin movie that Tsering’s brother was watching.

Rowan went home from the carwash on Saturday to find his long lost third cousins from Israel at his house. While he was home sick from school he got a call on the telephone from, ‘some weird guy from Israel who wanted to meet them.’ At first he was a little creeped out, but then he realized that they were family and it was all okay.

Tate watched “The Pianist” and really liked it. He was very enthusiastic and very adamant about the movie. I thought it was great to see him so excited about a movie, it inspired me to see it. Evan had a fun time in the mall in Burlington with Chase, girl-watching. He was glad that they had had a chance to connect. I thought that it was really nice to see how well the newish seventh graders were fitting in with the older kids, or in Evan’s case, the taller old kids.

On Saturday, instead of going to Finn’s house, Reed decided to go home and spend the night with her family which is something that they haven’t really done since Bryn got sick. She said that they just hung out and played cards and they just enjoyed each other’s company in a very relaxed and easy way.

Reed read the poem, “The Ritualists” by William Carlos Williams.

In may, approaching the city, I

Saw men fishing in the back wash

Between the slips, where at the times

No ship lay. But though I stood

Watching long enough, I didn’t see

One of them catch anything

More than quietness, to the formal

Rhymes of casting-that slow dance.

Tuesday Morning:

Calder got an email from his brother, Henry, asking what was up. Calder realized that he wanted to tell him everything. He wanted Henry to feel what he was feeling which I think just means that he misses him and wants him to come home.

Luke went out to dinner after the soccer game with a bunch of people, Simon included, and even though they were playing an immature game, he felt much closer to Simon than he did last year. He felt that he could really relate to him and I too think that Simon is doing awesome this year.

Aylee was left at school after everyone went to the soccer game and her mom was really late so she had to bike with Mia all the way to Mia’s house. She realized that even though Lydia wasn’t there, it wasn’t weird, it was just fun.

Kiley was chatting with Sophie over Gmail and it felt really good just to talk to her, not necessarily about meaningful things, but it was just nice to talk to her. Simon rode up to the soccer game with Kiley and connected to her which was something that he wasn’t able to do in seventh grade.

Yared was on Facebook last night and looked at pictures of the soccer game because he couldn’t be there and he thought that we looked really professional . Tal went on to say that we out played them by a ton! During the game, Tsering had counted how many passes we connected: 132 and the other team: 17. They only won because they were bigger and faster. They beat us 3 to 1.

Jesse read from Walt Whitman’s “Leaves of Grass.”

I will make the true poem of riches,

To earn for the body and the mind whatever adheres and

Goes forward and is not dropt by death;

I will effuse egotism and show it underlying all, and I will

Be the bard of personality,

And I will show of male and female that either is but the

Equal of the other,

Do you concentrate in me, for

I am determin’d to tell you with courageous clear

Voice to prove you illustrious,

And I will show that there is no imperfection in the present,

And can be none in the future,

And I will show that whatever happens to anybody it

May be turn’d to beautiful results,

And I will show that nothing can happen more beautiful

Than death,

And I will thread a thread through my poems that time

And events are compact,

And that all the things of the universe are perfect miracles,

Each as profound as any.

All Tal (afternoon):

Tal began by having everyone check themselves off for what they have yet to turn in and what they have turned in. He then showed us all who was scheduled to do their projects:

Kiley: November 1^st

Claire: November 3^rd

Jesse: November 4^th

This sparked many others to raise their hands to do their projects before Christmas break. After Tal explained for all of the seventh graders and a few ignorant older students (just kidding) how to do a project, he went on to read some place descriptions. First, he read Luke’s about going to the first night of Yom Kippur with his dad. In the place description, he saw Tal’s daughter Dalia and Dina. He saw the way his dad was with Dalia and he loved it. He loved his dad and he loved little babies like Dalia.

Tal then read Calder’s place description about concrete steps. It was the morning after the play last year and he felt empty. Empty and sad that the play was over, he felt alone. His mom was upstairs, sick. Henry was at a sleepover, and Tal wasn’t going to pick him up until the afternoon. In the place description, he was calling his dogs but they wouldn’t come back. It seemed like he was calling for the great feeling of the play to come back but it wouldn’t come. He just needed to wait to find that feeling again.

After that, we went downstairs to the basement to work on our art projects. We started off drawing an eight- tone drawing. Then we took cool shapes from the drawing, copied them onto three different colored sheets and cut them out. We then arranged them on the page and traced them. Today, we finished tracing them and picked a watercolor color scheme and painted the drawings.

Wednesday Morning:

Simon had a piano lesson and he had a lot of homework so he was distracted. He talked to his piano teacher. He thought he would be mad but he was very understanding. Simon was very happy that he could talk to his teacher and have him understand. Aylee and her mother J’amy came to Ultimate and Reed thought it was really awesome that they came because they are both really good ultimate players. Eric went on to say how proud he was of Aylee because she got through a run in with him and she is an excellent athlete and in general he is so impressed by everything she does at school.

Last night Luke talked to his brother on the phone about hockey and friends and school. He really enjoyed talking to him because he hadn’t talked to him in 2 or 3 weeks. Sarah thought about how in the lit book it said that the time almost stopped and how our lives are just a spark. Our time here is just a spark. It all goes by so fast, we never know exactly what our purpose it on this earth before our lives are over.Tal referred to a poem by e.e. cummings which begins with the line, “Once like a spark” and ends with the line, “and so to dark.” By the time meeting had ended, Ollie had found the poem on line and he read it to the class.

After school yesterday Jesse went to Anneke’s to give her place description to her. Anneke felt that when she wasn’t at school she was really missing something and she was really glad that Jesse came over.

Oliver read “The Munich Mannequins” by Sylvia Plath:

Perfection is terrible, it cannot have children.
Cold as snow breath, it tamps the womb

Where the yew trees blow like hydras,
The tree of life and the tree of life

Unloosing their moons, month after month, to no purpose.
The blood flood is the flood of love,

The absolute sacrifice.
It means: no more idols but me,

Me and you.
So, in their sulfur loveliness, in their smiles

These mannequins lean tonight
In Munich, morgue between Paris and Rome,

Naked and bald in their furs,
Orange lollies on silver sticks,

Intolerable, without minds.
The snow drops its pieces of darkness,

Nobody's about. In the hotels
Hands will be opening doors and setting

Down shoes for a polish of carbon
Into which broad toes will go tomorrow.

O the domesticity of these windows,
The baby lace, the green-leaved confectionery,

The thick Germans slumbering in their bottomless Stolz.
And the black phones on hooks

Glittering
Glittering and digesting Voicelessness. The snow has no voice

All Tal:

Tal talked about how Gus Biederman came to visit the other day. He said how in eighth grade, Gus said, “God did not make me to do Algebra, God made me for plowing the fields.” He said how Gus realized he wanted to be a farmer when he went to work at North Hollow Farm. He went to do this farming program in Scotland and when he came back, he was disgusted with the whole teenage scene. When Eric saw Gus outside talking to Tal he said that Gus was one of the reasons that NBS is the way that it is today, so Thank You Gus! Tal said that it was very revealing that Gus came here. It is a safe place at North Branch, a place where no one has to be afraid, a place people can come back to. We all support each other and love each other.

Tal read an email that Sophie McKibben (an alum) had written. Sophie is another person who was great and is part of the reason why NBS is the way it is today. She told of how she is now at United World College in Norway and her room overlooks one of the most beautiful fjords that she has ever seen. We discussed a how she realized just how much she missed North Branch.

She said that it becomes clear to her how much these three years mean, and how NBS has taught her to love, cry and to ask questions asked of her by crazy old grouch.

Tal said how last night Calder and him spent the entire night making a movie on iMovie called “Pond Plunge 2010” about Tal taking a dip in the pond on Sunday. Tal asked it anyone had anything they wanted to talk about in their self eval. Patrick tentatively raised his hand. He talked about how he respected Calder for doing such good work. He said how it was very different this year to not be at the complete top of the class all of the time. He wasn’t used to having to try as hard at school because the curriculum at his old school was not as hard, plus he wasn’t in a class with kids two years older than him.

Patrick talked about how he felt sad about how he hadn’t made any real friends like his old best friend. He feels like his friend has moved on too quickly. There is a hole without his friend that hasn’t yet been filled up. He misses his friend and the way that their friendship used to be.

Tal said that when Hadley came to talk about her dad dying, people didn’t really know what to say, so we stayed away from her, so we gave her the message that we didn’t care. We did care, we just didn’t know how to break down the barrier of awkwardness and not knowing how to relate. Tal said if Patrick missed his friend, then he should call his friend. Then Tal went on a rant about awkwardness and how awful it is when you forget someone’s name and you have to ask someone else, and how if you don’t work to stay close and in the light of the friendships that you love, they will dim and you lose precious time and whatever love that is possible.

Finn said that she thought that if you don’t work at friendship it won’t work. Tal made a few inappropriate comments about where someone’s head shouldn’t be but sometimes is, but we won’t get into the details. Patrick said he feels close to Yared because Yared listens to him. Tal went on another totally random rant about jock straps, mainly because someone said Yared was a jock. Tal asked if this meant that Yared was a jock strap. The class discussion went into the weeds for a minute and then Tal asked Patrick some more questions. Patrick also feels close to Rider. He said that rider sort of seemed like a jock, too. Now everyone launched into a debate about being jock straps for Halloween. Rider gave a metaphor about seventh graders. He said, that when a new seventh grader comes, they latch onto an older kid so they don’t sink. It is easier to latch onto a flotation device (older kids) than another sevie and sink. Patrick said it sometimes feels like a race to fit in. We discussed this for a while.

Tal, while guiding this conversation expertly, said that when you are with someone, someone you like, if they are charmed by your crappy car, then they are the one for you. Sophie related Patrick’s feelings to her own seventh grade experience. Rider said that he was amazed at how much Patrick is like him. Rider said that he was just like Patrick when he was in seventh grade. When Rider was in seventh grade, he felt that he had to tell everyone how great he was to believe it himself. No matter how fast people seem like they fit it, you will get there. It is different for everyone.

Simon was sad because he was missing the class trip to Montreal to go to Spain. We said that the way to make Simon be there was to bring him back meaningless crap from China Town. Tal also said that it is important for Simon to love the time he DOES have with his mates and not hold too tightly to a few hours galavanting around in Montreal with a bunch of creepy middle-schoolers. Tal read part of a story from his old school Paideia to illustrate how wonderful and crazy we all are.

Thursday Morning:

Last night Rider was thinking of someone to send his place description to and he realized he could send it to any one of us at the school. That made him feel good because it showed that he was able to trust all of us.

Oliver said he was really looking forward to lit class where we will be discussing the ending of our lit book “Of Mice and Men.” Simon had a good time making cookie dough with Oliver, Sophie and Kiley. Finn called her friend last night even though she felt like she had changed. She realized her friend had been having a hard time in middle school and she felt a lot better that she had called her. Last night Anneke was doing homework with her sister and she fell asleep while Anneke was reading the lit. She thought how hard and painful it would be to kill her sister like George had to do with Lennie. Last night Luke sent his dad his place description. It was the first time in three years that he had ever shown his parents anything he had written. His dad wrote back and said that he really liked it and he thought that Luke was a good writer and that he loved Luke, and this made Luke feel good, so good that he emailed Tal to tell him about it.

Calder came home from the soccer game and he was watching Dalia in the back seat of the truck and he thought it was amazing to watch her grow.

Rio read a poem that he wrote called “But a Dream:”

Vines weaving in and out between my toes,

Where am I,

Am I awake or is this a dream,

Fakeness wrapped around my wrists.

It was not long till I will be gone,

But a memory will hold.

I will remember,

Imagine what I miss,

Not able,

Too far away.

Fiends disperse,

Unknowing.

I love a place,

And the things that live there.

Packed around me,

Holding tight.

Tick tock, tick tock,

In reverse,

Soul spilling out,

Flooding the rocks that hold up the wall that we build,

Packing it together,

As one.

Where have we gone?

Where have we been?

Am I awake or is this a dream,

Hope is what,

We need this,

More and more.

Friday:

Rowan went for a run with his brother and they were talking about soccer and friends and school.

Ollie said that on the bus he was sitting with Sebastian, and he said that in school the other day, they watched “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” in school. Ollie told him how we watched “Of Mice and Men.” Sebastian was curious so Ollie told him all about it.

Rider said that every Thursday he has been coaching the Ripton school little kids soccer, and he thought that it was awesome how even thought everything was totally chaotic, they were completely free and they knew exactly what they wanted.

Last night, Anna’s friend Piper spent the night at her house. Usually Anna feels that Piper isn’t completely

open with her but tonight, she felt totally free with her and they had a great time.

Last night, Yared was with his dad and he asked Yared to help him with dinner. He did and they had a really good time together cooking. Tal went on a rant about his giblet, of which he feels embarrassed, neck beards, and different weird hairstyles. It was appropriate and related to everything we were talking about.

Eliot was on his way home from school and before they got there, he got out of the car and ran home. He really enjoyed that because he hadn’t really gotten to be outside much this year after school. Yared was on Facebook last night and he saw that Eliot had said, “I hate George, I hate George, I hate George” (referring to the lit book), and at first he was angry with Eliot. Then he realized that he couldn’t get mad at Eliot for his opinion and he saw that he had no reason to be mad.

We then had a discussion about George. “I hate tragedy,” says Tal, “but half of life is tragedy. But then again, the other half is comedy.”

Last night Rose was reading a poem about an eagle taking Muhammad’s boot, at first Muhammad was angry but then, a poisonous snake dropped out and he saw that the eagle had taken it to save him. That is what George did to Lennie by killing him. He saved him from jail, from being lynched or being shot by another man. This is the poem Rose read.

Hearing a voice calling him to prayer, Muhammad] asked for water

to perform ablutions. He washed his hands

and feet, and just as he reached for his boot,

an eagle snatched it away! The boot turned upsidedown

as it lifted, and a poisonous snake dropped out.

The eagle circled and brought the boot back,

saying, "My helpless reverence for you

made this necessary…"

Muhammad thanked the eagle,

and said, "What I thought was rudeness

was really love. You took away my grief,

and I was grieved!"

Yared read the poem “Wild Geese” by Mary Oliver:

You do not have to be good.


You do not have to walk on your knees


For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.


You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.


Tell me about your despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.


Meanwhile the world goes on.


Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain


are moving across the landscapes,


over the prairies and the deep trees,


the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese,

high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.


Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,


the world offers itself to your imagination,


calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting --


over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

5. Last Week

Trying to get the energy for the last class --i have to quell the current conversatioon:

"breakfast is the most important meal of the day...."

and

"Tal, can I start lit class"

and

"Tal, i'm really looking forward to lit class."

and

"My whole family was sleeping and I was just crying in my bed while I was reading lit..."

and

"Once George says I'm not mad at you and I never have been, then Lennie is happy and that is where he wants to be."

and

"going off topic, Lennie was imagining his Aunt Clara, he was punishing himself, it seems like it wasn't his fault, he couldn't control his strength or his fear. In the clearing he was afraid George would be mad, and then the rabbit comes out of his mind and those rabbits were his fears."

And

"It's like what you were talking about with Gus the other day, who wanted to have a farm but he can't have it now and so maybe he is holding on to the idea of it so tightly that he can't live now."

and

“Hey Yared, carrying a lit book around in your back pocket is cool.”

"Hey Tal, so is carrying around a luger..." says Miles, referring to Carlson, who shot Candy’s old dog. He is holding a toy gun we used in one of our plays three years ago.

and

"Lennie is almost like every animal in all the Steinbeck books--like Candy's dog, like the horse the Red Pony..."

The conversation rolls and rolls around without end.

***

One of the girls bought a life size baby doll in Burlington, a baby with blue eyes. She brought it to school to take care of it. Something to hold on to. Something better than a boring old conversation. A ninth grade boy became the father, but they were divorced and they were having disputes over the custody and possession of the baby, and also fighting over what its name would be. There are disputes about neglect, abuse, and restraining orders. Other students became uncles, old boy friends, lawyers, judges, social workers, flirting love interests, concerned parties. Some kids, on the outside of the game, wondered what all the fuss was about. All of them pretending to love it, hold it, fight over it, steal it, dress it, take care of it...

They are taking care of this innocent thing that they want to love. Then there is some playful threatening of the child, some rough handling of it. In the game, as it should, this becomes upsetting. The game isn't a game, it is an enactment of real feelings.

We have a conference about the baby. The girl who brought it in doesn’t have a close sibling. She wants to take care of something. She still loves to play with dolls. And so why not here? She doesn’t want people in the class to play meanly or do the baby wrong. She wants everyone to respect the life that the doll represents and to respect her reasons for bringing the doll.

By the end of the week nearly everyone had played the game. Nearly everyone has sat through a class holding the baby, carefully, or cradling it, or patting its head. Everyone who touched the baby, touched it with gentleness. In the middle of a wiffleball game, we turn around to see someone else stroking the baby’s cheeks. There is a seventh grade boy solving an algebra problem with the baby doll bouncing on his knee.

The doll, and the caretakers, are not unlike Lennie and George in Of Mice and Men. We want to take care of Lennie, of their dream, of Lennie's innocence. The doll represents life, the dream, the world we will or want to enter. The baby doll is the fragile thing we are holding, here on the cusp of adulthood, a riveting game of real life played out by children. The baby doll it not a game. It is human being. It is humans playing at being human. We see the baby needs to be taken care, of like George loved Lennie. It is not okay to tease a small thing or mishandle someone’s dream. So the dream object is handed around and around, like words in a conversation we are learning to love.